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| Tallahassee, FL – Just when you thought it was safe to cast a vote in the Sunshine State, another election scandal has hit Florida harder than a tropical storm named after a chick. First, there were controversies in the 2000 presidential election and in the current democratic primary race for governor. Now, votes cast from Florida during the popular “American Idol” television series finale are being disputed, with “Idol” runner-up Justin Guarini and his lawyers saying that African-American votes were not completely tallied. Although Kelly Clarkson was declared the winner of “Idol” last week, the controversy erupted when demographic details of the voting were released yesterday. According to official numbers released by ABC television, which produced “Idol”, Guarini received only 35% of the African-American votes cast from the state of Florida, but received at least 64% of the African-American votes cast in every other state. Also, according to ABC, only 13,569 African-Americans in Florida voted during the “Idol” final, the lowest number of any state. The next lowest African-American vote total came from South Dakota, where 21,874 of the state’s 23,555 African-Americans voted. Guarini has hired a legal team, and they are hard at work to get the votes re-counted, or to have the entire state of Florida vote again for either Guarini or Clarkson. Said Guarini lead attorney Carl Edmonds, “To claim that only 13,000 African-Americans in the state of Florida voted during the ‘American Idol’ final is absurd, and to say that only 35% of those votes were cast for (Guarini) is downright ludicrous. Justin has a very enthusiastic and loyal African-American following.” According to Neilsen television ratings, over 3 million Floridians watched the “American Idol” finals. Although racial and ethnic demographics are not part of the Neilsen ratings, Edmonds said that “a good number” of those viewers “must be” African-American, adding “I’ve been to Florida a number of times, and I always see (African Americans)". While speaking to a group of privileged children at a private school in Orlando, governor Jeb Bush attempted to deflect questions about the "American Idol" controversy. "The only American idol that I know is my brother, President George W. Bush. And that Hulk Hogan character. I've always kind of admired him." Florida NAACP spokesperson Andrew Morris said that he can not be certain whether the “Idol” votes are accurate, adding that at this time the NAACP is staying neutral on the controversy. “The voting was done via the internet and the telephone. It is very difficult to track the accuracy and sources of those votes.” He added that the voting may very well be accurate, saying “I like to think that black folks in Florida aren’t stupid or bored enough to watch (American Idol)”. Despite the lack of NAACP support, Edmonds says that he plans to file papers with the Florida Supreme Court, asking for either a re-count, or a re-vote. Until that case is heard, Kelly Clarkson will remain the “American Idol” winner. Clarkson, who is recording her first single, tentatively titled "Love is Like, So Killer!", issued a press release that stated “America has spoken, and I am the winner. I just hope that Justin can accept that fact and get on with his life”. Guarini was rehearsing for a dinner-theater production of “Death of a Salesman” in Wheeling, West Virginia, and was not immediately available for comment. Click Here to go to the front page and get more satire! |
| All material written by Doug Small Copyright © 2002, 2003 Doug Small |
| Florida's "American Idol" Votes Disputed: Runner-up Demands Re-count |