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| You know, a lot of people don’t take what I say seriously, because I am a good-looking guy. They look at me and think that I’m dumb, which really makes me mad. So, I’m really glad that I have a chance to write in The Blue Brick, to prove to everyone that I am not stupid, and that I can write about things that are important. That’s why I’ve chosen to write about what it’s like to be married to a hot chick, who in my case is my wife, Jennifer Aniston. I met Jen (I call her Jen, which is short for her real name, which is Jennifer) a few years ago at a party in Hollywood. I usually don’t go to a lot of parties, but I was kind of horny and I knew that I could probably find a chick there, so I went. Anyway, Jen was there, too. Damn, she looked good. I’ll try to describe her to you. She looked a lot like her character on Friends, Rachel looks, which is hot, right? I knew right away that I had to talk to her. We ended up spending most of the party together, talking about all kinds of cool stuff. We had a lot in common, like both being actors and good-looking. Plus, it turns out that we both like dogs and swimming pools. It was like I had finally met someone that I could talk to and want to sleep with. Well, we talked a while longer, and I made sure that we both kept drinking. One thing led to another, and we became a couple later that night. About a year later, we got married. That was a really cool thing. Almost everyone that was there was someone that one of us knew, and we had a lot of good food and booze. Jen looked really hot in her wedding dress, because it was white and her skin was tan. That is a good combination for a chick. Being married to her is great, because she is hot and we still talk to each other about stuff. The best is the morning, when she wakes up and walks around the house in a pair of my boxers and a T-shirt. I like that because her legs look even skinnier coming out of boxer shorts, and I really like skinny legs. Anyway, in the morning we will usually eat breakfast and then have our assistants read scripts for us while we go to the pool and swim. Remember how I said we both like swimming pools? Well, we have one at our house for just that reason. Later, we’ll go and do promotion and interviews for our latest movies. If we have nothing to promote, we usually take a nap together and then talk some more over a couple of cocktails before dinner. Then later we will go to bed and have sex with each other, which is really great because Jen is so hot. This routine changes when either of us is working on a film and we have to go away for the shoot. Usually we will call each other at night and talk about how much we love each other, and how great our swimming pool is. I miss Jen the most at night, when I usually would be having sex with her. My assistant will try to keep my mind occupied by giving me things to play with, or making me really good snacks to eat, but it just isn’t the same as being home with Jen. Even when I am away, though, it is really cool to be married to a hot chick like Jen. Because I know that she is so hot, and when I get home she will be there waiting for me and she will look good, no matter what. I feel really lucky to be with her, even when I am not with her. Do you know what I mean? To sum it all up, it is cool as hell to be married to a hot chick. I tried to tell my friend George Clooney that he should marry a hot chick, too. But I don’t think that he really listened to me because I saw him later that night hitting on two different cocktail waitresses. But, you, The Blue Brick reader, should definitely marry a hot chick. Unless you are a chick, and then you should marry a hot guy. So, if you are a chick, just read this again and replace the word “chick” with the word “dude”, and I think that you will see my point. |
| Guest Editorial: Brad Pitt "What it's Like to be Married to a Hot Chick" |